


My Name

by hungry_hobbits



Category: The Terror (TV 2018), The Terror - Dan Simmons
Genre: Fluff, M/M, Self-indulgent fluff, i'm on a bridglar kick it seems, i'm sure no one will complain
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-07-14
Updated: 2018-07-14
Packaged: 2019-06-10 02:51:10
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 990
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15281943
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/hungry_hobbits/pseuds/hungry_hobbits
Summary: “If you could give me one thing, what would it be?”





	My Name

**Author's Note:**

> Just some self-indulgent fluff I wanted to write based off a line of dialogue for Bridgens I came up with.

They laid together quietly, the only sound was the wind beating gently against the sides of their canvas tent. They chose to stay together, and of course they did, they were inseparable after all.

It was their solace to lay curled up against one another, another uncountable measure of miles behind them. Captain Crozier had them walking for days, sleeping against boat sledges as he was absolutely desperate to make some sort of headway before dark fall or cold snaps. The men were exhausted.

And yet, despite being ugly bruises and bloody teeth, Peglar still smiled, if only briefly. If only for a few moments. His tired eyes rested only when his lover’s did, and even then it was lightly. Too much fear in the camp. Too much to fear. Too much danger to keep a listen out for. He felt safer with Bridgens, _his John_. The man was his calm in the eye of the storm.

 

“I don’t think I’ll sleep tonight.” Peglar admitted, though not to the surprise of his lover, “The wind, John, when it picks up it roars through the tents, y’know? Makes me think of that awful beast. Makes it hard to sleep.”

Bridgens simply nodded. “It does have a familiar rumble, doesn’t it? But we’ve nothing to fear of the wind, not out here at least. So try and rest, my love. Try to sleep.” He knew his partner was ill, and that illness made him more susceptible to fear. Though Bridgens did not want to completely acknowledge Peglar’s failing health, for acknowledging that meant accepting the possibility that Peglar was right in what he said a time prior,

 _You’re going to outlive me, John_.

The thought of those few words and what they could cause should the sick man’s prophecy come to fruition, it would be a complete undoing of John Bridgens’ entire world.

 _You are my loved one._ He remembered saying it, trying to calm his lover’s angry heart. _The only man or woman or child left in the world who cares whether I am alive or dead._ He had meant it, every word. No one on in the world would ever care about him as much as his Harry.

 

“John,” the former foretop captain propped himself up on an arm that was more purple bruise than skin so that he was half sitting up when he looked at Bridgens, “can I ask you a question?”

“Of course.” Bridgens’ met Peglar’s contemplative look with a gentle smile that often found itself on his weary face. “Ask away.” He reached a hand up to tuck a piece of his lover’s shaggy hair away from his eyes. He needed a haircut, a beard trim, too, but they had no time for that and they couldn’t waste precious water on such a frivolous thing.

“If you could give me one thing, what would it be?”

Bridgens laughed, “What a queer question, my love. Why do you ask?”

“Just curious. Just thinkin’. Need something to keep my mind off other things.” Off other things. Off death. Off the beast. Off the damned cold they were forced to exist in.

“Well,” Bridgens looked thoughtful for a moment, but in truth he needed no time to think of an answer for it was a question he contemplated often. He wanted to give Peglar everything and anything he ever wanted, anything that would make him happy. He’d give him his beating heart and living soul if the man asked him. “I would give you the world, the moon, the sun, every star in the sky. But, unfortunately I am mortal, so the most permanent thing I could give you is _my name_.”

“Your name? You mean like in marriage?”

Bridgens nodded. His hand cupped the side of Peglar’s face and let his thumb rub gently against the wind burnt cheek of his lover, “All I’ve ever wanted is for you to be happy. I’m not a rich man, not by any means, but the things I wish to give you like my heart, my love, my life, they are free for you to take. But my name…” He locked eyes with Peglar, saw how the spark seemed to return for a brief time as he spoke, “ _My name_ is something that could last a very long time, something you could keep with you even when I was gone.”

“I think I would like that… your name, I mean. It’s a nice thing to have. Harry Bridgens doesn’t sound half bad.”

“No, darling,” Bridgens gently pulled Peglar down so that they may kiss, “it doesn’t sound bad at all.”

They shared a soft kiss, something that they missed during their long trek through the arctic, and during their time of separation when each called a different ice-lodged ship ‘home’. It was tender and slow, a sweet gesture that was much needed.

 

Peglar was the first to pull away. His chapped and cracked lips felt warmer from the contact. It hurt to smile but he did it anyway, because he knew Bridgens was reassured by his smile. “Was that a proposal?” He asked softly, his smile spreading into a smirk that looked a bit funny on such a gentle face.

“Something like that, though I would save a true proposal for when I had a ring. Or for when we were not currently stuck in the Arctic.”

“True. Alright, I’ll wait for the proper one before I say yes.”

“You’ll wait that long?” Bridgens tilted his head.

“I’ve waited forever for you, John. Think I can wait a while longer.”

Bridgens laughed softly, pressing their foreheads together. “I promise not to keep you waiting too long. I love you too much.”

“I love you too, John. I love you, too.”

 

They rested together again, this time face to face, arms holding one another close. The only sounds being their soft breathing and the winds beating against the sides of the tents.


End file.
